Why Identity Coaching Is the First Step to Changing Everything

When you don’t know who you are, you end up living a life that was never meant for you.

There comes a moment, quiet but jarring...when you look around at your life and think, “How did I get here?” You’ve checked the boxes. You’ve done what was expected. Maybe you’re successful on paper. But deep down, something feels…off.

That moment isn’t failure. It’s a signal. A wake-up call from within. And it’s usually the first whisper that you’ve been living disconnected from your true identity.

This is why identity coaching is the cornerstone of all meaningful change.

Because before you can shift your career, your relationships, your self-worth, or your future, you have to know who you really are.

The Truth: Most People Are Performing, Not Living

We’re taught to people-please, to conform, to shrink or shape-shift for approval. Over time, you forget what you want, what you value, and who you were before the world told you who to be.

You start living a life of obligation instead of intention.

Identity coaching is the process of stripping all that away, not to create someone new, but to return to who you’ve always been. To come home to yourself.

Why This Matters

If you don’t know who you are, then every decision you make, from your career to your boundaries to the way you love, will be built on a shaky foundation.

But when you do know who you are? You become unshakeable.

• You set boundaries that align with your worth.

• You pursue goals that actually light you up.

• You attract relationships that reflect your truth.

• You stop abandoning yourself for approval.

This is where real transformation begins.

My Work Is Built Around This First Step

In my coaching, in my keynotes, and in my own story, everything starts with identity. It’s why the first phase of my Martini Method™ is all about Mindset: understanding the beliefs and stories you’ve absorbed so you can shift into a more authentic, aligned version of yourself.

You can't integrate what you haven't yet identified.

And you can’t become who you’re meant to be until you get radically honest about who you are right now.

So if you’re feeling stuck… it’s not them. It’s you.

But not in the way you think.It’s because you’ve forgotten yourself.

Let’s change that.